27 Ιαν 2011

Περιγραφή, προοπτικές εργασίας, μισθός και αποζημίωση. Επάγγελμα; Μάνα, Μητέρα, Μανούλα, Μαμά!

Κυκλοφορεί στον ιστό, και μου θύμισε αυτό το μπλουζάκι (φωτο) που έχω πολλλλλά χρόνια, πριν ακόμη πιάσω την παρακάτω δουλειά.. Και είναι το μόνο που ασυνείδητα δεν μαζεύω με τα Καλοκαιρινά! Όπως η δουλειά μας, που δεν έχει άδειες ;-) απολαύστε το!
JOB DESCRIPTION: Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment.
Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.
RESPONSIBILITIES: The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5.
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three sec onds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers.
Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next.
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION: Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you .
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION: Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent.

When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS: While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.
Forward this on to all the moms you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis, and let them know they are appreciated.
I am a cook, a taxi, a mentor, a housekeeper, a counselor, a warden, a doctor, a piggyback carrier, a laundry attendant,, My job varies everyday and I never get a day off, I work 24/7, 365 days a yr.
I LOVE MY JOB!!! CAN YOU ALL SAY THAT?!

2 σχόλια:

  1. Λίγο πριν φτάσουμε στα όριά μας, ας θυμόμαστε την κατακλείδα... Και το άλλο πάντως που μου έμεινε είναι το " if you play your cards right". Έκτος όλων των άλλων θέλει και μεγάλη δόση έμπνευσης αυτή η...δουλειά. Καλή δύναμη σε όλες τις μανούλες!!!
    Mama4

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  2. Να 'σαι καλά Μάμαφορ (επιτρέπεις;), κάτι θα ξέρεις κι εσύ... Είσαι όμως.. γάτα! κι εμένα αυτό μου σκάλωσε, το θέμα δεν είναι απλώς να την πάρεις τη δουλειά!

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